Heyy people 🙂
First of all I’m sorry for being absent for that long, I had severe writers block and was busy with uni stuff. Buuut here I am trying to be more on this blog again. So I hope you forgive me.
This post is about an issue I see to be confronted with quite often and which has always been bothering me. It’s the fact that a lot of males seem to believe that girls dress/wear make up to please them and to be liked by them. I know, I know the moral should slowly become clear towards the end of a post but as I want to be very clear about this I’m just going to state it right at the beginning: We generally don’t. Dear boys I’m very sorry to disappoint you, but not every thing a girl does is about you. Shocking I know. Sit down a minute. Breathe. Have a sip of water. And then get of that fucking high horse.
You might wonder what caused me being so angry about that so I will share my personal experiences with that topic. Today I saw this social media post that was like : “oh yes she’s wearing red nailpolish now I want to hit on her….Said no guy ever”. As I couldn’t just swallow that I commented “Cute that guys still believe everything girls do is for them”. Someone actually answered me that In the end it actually is. I was furious. As if I wore nailpolish for random guys who a) probably don’t even notice it, because honestly I don’t think when you meet a girl, the first thing you look at are her nails and b) don’t even know a difference between scarlet and rose. So yeah probably fucking not. As you might already assume there are reasons this post made me so angry. As a girl you’re always told not to wear that much make up, or don’t wear your hair short, or don’t dress a certain way because “boys don’t like that”. On the other hand having certain characteristics are good because boys it. Sometimes when I had issues with my body not being super skinny even my Mum told me that it was okay “because men like women with curves”. It was also fine, that I have small breasts, as there are men who’s type I am like that. I never thought much about that until I became a feminist. One day after that I clarified that I didn’t give a damn what men think about my body because the only think that counts is what I think about it. I don’t need and will never need approval for any parts of my body of any guy who has nothing to do with them. My mum looked at me surprised, but she understood. Not everyone seems to get that unfortunately. I dated a guy who used to tell me I would look better with shorter hair and explained to me in detail what kind of clothes I should wear to make myself more attractive to him and guys in general. It went so far he once told me, that I was lucky to be the height I am, because if I was taller less guys would want me. When I told him that I didn’t think it was my purpose on this earth to meet any guys expectations, he just stuck with his point and didn’t take me serious. I know that not all guys are like that, but I was honestly shocked and a bit disappointed in the male gender. That were the most remarkable moments I had with that issue, there were some more, but I think you understand why this post upset me so much. Of course I have to admit there are cases when girls dress up for boys. When you dress up for a date and wonder which dress he’d like on you. When you wear a certain jumper when you see your boyfriend, because you know he likes it and you make an effort to look pretty for him. When you have a crush and you want him to notice you so you wear a flattering outfit. But seriously I don’t believe any girl gets up in the morning thinking “well what could I wear today what the boys out there would like” And nobody wears make up for a person who doesn’t even notice what you have in your face. Even in the cases where you could say girls dress up for guys, we always choose the things we feel pretty in and confident and like the best version of ourselves. So in reality it’s about that. We wear the things we feel good in and the things we like and we wear make up or don’t wear it because that’s the way we want to express yourself and feel like the motherfucking queens we are. And yes that has to do with how other people perceive us and of course it makes us feel good to hear compliments, but in the end it’s about us feeling comfortable in our skin. So boys if you ever think a girl chose that top with the big cleavage for your pleasure or is wearing those heels just so you think she’s sexy you’re probably wrong (and a self absorbed prick). She’s doing it because she knows she slays and SHE feels sexy in those clothes. And remember that ‘s all that matters. We don’t need your opinion on our bodies or style, so if we don’t ask please keep it to yourselves. And girls: Keep doing you. Don’t listen to men telling you what you should do and how you should look. Same for other women. You’re not living for anyone but yourself and you don’t need anyone’s approval for your personal choices.
That was my rant I hope you liked it. 🙂
Talk to you soon
Love Ally
castawayminds 