To the guy who can fuck himself

Today is one of them days that started off good but then an event happened and all you want to do is go to your bed, have a good cry, eat a shit ton of ice cream and then eventually fall asleep whilst watching a sad film and crying.

Some people might say that it is pathetic why I’m down all of the sudden but today happened something that happens to me quite frequently and something that is about something that I’m not happy about about my body.

Let me explain what happened:

So I had a group meeting with two of my friends for Uni. Whilst walking back from it with Maren (I have mentioned her before here, she’s like my best friend at Uni), we past some traffic lights. I think at this point we weren’t talking but I was just thinking about something that I had to do or we were just talking about. When some guy shouted out something out of a car window. Because I was deep in my thoughts I didn’t catch what he was saying, I only heard that Maren answered something inappropriate/rude. So I asked what he was just saying whilst they drove away. She told me that he just shouted out of the window: You’re fat.

Since they shouted it to us, it’s clear that he meant me. Because let’s face it, I’m not really skinny or thin and have quite a few pounds too much on me. He definitely didn’t mean Maren because she has a great physique and is very toned.

After this happened we popped to the food shop very quickly to get some stuff but it was weird. Like there was a weird feeling in the air after it happened, or at least I felt so.

On the one hand I hate myself for not catching what he was saying because I would have liked to say something back like: Better fat than ugly, or something like that.

But on the other hand, who the fuck gave this guy the right to shout something like this to a girl on the street you’ve never met in your life before? Have you ever thought that this person might have feelings and you can hurt someone by saying such nasty things?

As I said before being called fat or ugly isn’t the first time for me (here’s another example when I wrote about another twat calling me out being too fat (The one time I met an absolute twat), but it never happened in such a rude way. And I also know that something like this shouldn’t get to me because let’s face it the guy who shouted it was just an absolute twat and honestly I’m usually a very polite person and only want the best for everybody, but believe me when I say I don’t care if he would just break his leg or so. In fact that would be karma and the right thing to happen to him. Although I know that, it still got to me.

Like has he ever thought about that the person he just called out because of their weight might have some serious health problems? Like no matter what it is. So many people struggle with their weight because of health reasons, so no fucking person has the right to call someone else out because of their appearance. No matter if it is because they are very thin or because they are bigger. He clearly hasn’t thought about the fact that someone might have something like hypothyroidism or other medical conditions. A person might want to look thin but simply can’t because of a condition they have.

On the other hand someone could have a serious mental problem concerning their body. There are serious mental illnesses that a lot of people have, like bulimia, anorexia, obesity or in general all kind of eating disorders. Clearly a person like him has no fucking idea what such a nasty comment like his can do to the person he just shouted it to.

And normally that’s something I don’t talk about and only one of my friends knows about it but in fact I have had eating disorders in the past. To the point where I still have to track my food, just to make sure that I eat the right amount of things. I had to track my food for 4 or 5 years now and I have so many journals I have written and hid before. Like non of my friends or my family knows about this. Only my doctor. And I guess you now…

This guy and so many other people don’t have a fucking idea what the hell is going on in this peoples life so nor he or anybody else has a right to say a fucking thing about how anybody but himself/herself looks like.

Although I know all of these things it still messes with my head. It messes up with my head that much that I’m sitting here spending too much time thinking about what happened today and writing this blog post. When in fact he should be not even worth a second of my life. And it definitely didn’t help with the way I ate the rest of the day then and the next few days.

Always think about what you say to others. Such a small sentence can have an enormous impact on someone’s life without you even knowing it.

Lots of love,

Jenny

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10 Things About Peru

Hey everyone, 

I am sorry that it is once again a post about my stay in Peru but as it is currently all I am doing, it is constantly on my mind. As it has not been that long since I got here I thought I would write 10 things that stood out to me, that I find strange, that seem typically Peruvian or in some other way stood out.

1. It is winter here but during the day we have 25 degrees Celsius. Like I am so busy rubbing sun lotion on 24/7 cause it is so warm and it’s supposed to be winter. The only thing giving that away is that there is snow on the mountains. But that’s about it. 

2. There are so many stray dogs and I want them all. It doesn’t matter where in Arequipa you walk around you can see them everywhere. In travel warnings you are advised to stay away from them because of rabies, but most of them seem friendly and don’t even come close to humans. But I made a friend a. The bus st before. That dog came up to me and sat next to me and kept stubbing me with his nose as to say ‘please give me attention.’ Sadly our bus came before I could give him attention.

3. The combi busses. Basically every the busses here are about the size of how a 9 seater in Europe or the US. However, here they have the drives row, and then 5 additional rows and the most I have been in with was 25. It sounds crammed and horrific, but it is not that bad. Also they always play music in the bus and being on there has quite a cool vibe, plus it makes you feel like you belong. 

4. I stand out. I am 5’8″ (1.73m) which makes me about a head taller than the average Peruvian I have encountered here. I am white. Yes, there are other tourists but not that many that you would not stand out with white skin. I have gingery, curly hair. Also in a sea full of dark brown to black hair that stands out. Not being used to it, it is really weird that people look at you just when you walk through the streets. But it also has its perk. For example a little girl pointed at me the other day and said “Bonita señorita” which totally made my day. 

5. As I have only been to Arequipa I can only talk about this city it everything here is remarkably clean. Honestly the streets are slippery because they are so clean and polished. Considering as well that there are stray dogs everywhere I find it incredible how well kept the city is. 

6. If the houses here are not old colonial buildings and are impressive churches or official buildings, the houses are all so colourful. You name it orange, yellow, pink, red, light blue, purple, mint green, I have seen it all and it makes it all the more beautiful and colourful.

7. They don’t seem to have hallways inside. In the hostel and the home where I work, as well as in buildings that I walk past the stairwells and hallways are all out in the open. Granted it doesn’t rain here a lot especially at the moment so it makes sense, but for someone who is not used to it it definitely stands out. 

8. Most of the cars here would probably not be allowed on the streets anywhere in Europe or North America. First of all because of emissions. Like seriously so many emissions and it smells like it. But secondly most of the cars are so old and would under no circumstances fall under safety regulations. Like the taxis don’t really have seat belts. Many are missing mirrors and so on. But oh well. You kinda get used to it. 

9. One thing that I have noticed is that currently despite it being warm no one is really wearing shorts or short skirts or dresses. Considering that it is over 20 degrees it strikes me as odd. Considering that it is winter for them it seems fair. I have to say it is quite nice not having people nag me for wearing black jeans while it is really warm out cause everyone else does it to! 

10. The advertising and menus of most restaurants even if they are like a good quality look like the advertising of fast food restaurants or takeaways like kebab shops or chippys. They all have big pictures of their foods and it just looks cheap and makes you a bit sceptical. But we have been to some and they are actually quite good! 
Anyways I hope you enjoy this! 
Lots of love, 

Katie 

My first week in Peru

My first week in Peru is now over and it has already gotten to the weird stage where it feels like I just got here but also like I have been here forever. I finally got over the jetlag, I am slowly getting over the altitude and I am starting to have a daily routine. Arequipa makes it easy though to start to feel at home. While some things are certainly very different, Arequipa’s European routes are inside and it is overall a really modern city. Arequipa is after Altima the second biggest city in Peru and I is in the middle of the Amdes at about 2,500m above sea level. 

In to picture you can see the Plaza de Armas which is like the main square of Arequipa at least when it comes to tourist attractions and the old part of the city. There are many restaurant, shops, sights and tourist agencies areound it and of course the basilica that you can see in the picture. It is impressive from the outside and absolutely gorgeous from the inside. I went there for a service as it is a huge part of the Peruvian culture and it was definitely worth it!

Overall I have already discovered that there are many churches all across Arequipa as it seems to be a huge part of the life here. 

Another thing that there is a lot of at the Plaza de Armas and all over the city and which can seems to be a huge part of the culture are the stray dog so! Honestly there are so many and I just want to take all of them home and make sure that they are all okay!

More animals that I was already excited about before coming here were the llama and alpacas and when I found out that there is a far, for them really close with no entry it was no question that I would show up there. It was a maxing we got to feed them, but sadly they didn’t like to be petted. However, my mission while being here is to visit them often enough to make them trust me and let me pet them. I mean look at them they are so cute and gorgeous and amazing!!!

However, due to my jetlag that is about the exploring I have done in week one. Though I am hoping to do more this weekend here in Arequipa. 

But now onto the reason I am actually here for, which is the volunteering. I am working in a girls home and my main task is to play with them, help the with their homework, and to be there for them. the girls in the house are between 3 and 18 years old though everyone over 14 is in school while we are there. Which leaves us more time for the little ones who need the support more. 

The other volunteer and I were both surprised, both by the good condition of the house and how loving and trusting the girls were. As most of them have some history of being mistreated we assumed it would take them time to warm up to us, yet we were greeted with hugs and were pulled around the place by our hands three kids on one arm, as they all wanted to show it to us. 

They call us ‘hermana’ sister, which is very cute. The favorite thing of the young ones to do is to use me as a climbing frame or me to spin them around. they love playing with my hair because it is so different to what they are used to.

I also brought a frisbee and some of the girls are super keen to play with it and even the little ones are trying to get involved although the frisbee is about a third of their height. But it is amazing to see that they are that interested in it and want to learn. 

As my Spanish sadly currently still is horrible it is quite overwhelming at times to try to talk to all the girls and my brain is starting to develop the habit of mixing all languages I know together which makes it hard to communicate. but I can already see slight improved ties and being around the girls A lot of the vocabulary I learned is coming back and I am hoping for my Spanish to really improve over the next couple of weeks. 

Hopefully going got a frisbee training here will help too! One of the girls, who is about my age and works at the home full time, asked me if I want to join her team on Sunday and while I am extremely nervous about the language, Iam excited to meet Peruvians hopefully my age and to have some fun! 
I’ll update you on my journey next week!

 Lots of love, Katie
Instagram: @katfeyer for more pictures 

Favourite Beautiful Music Videos

So I am someone who is very easily addicted to an artist and when I find someone I will watch every single music video listen to every single song that I can find somewhere on the internet. Recently, I have found a couple of music videos that I love, so I thought I would make a list of those that I love, both of artists/ videos that I recently discovered and some that I have liked for a while/ages. So enjoy!

1. Alessia Cara- Scars To Your Beautiful

The first time I heard about this song was by being stuck in a YouTube spiral and somehow came across a live performance of this song. I immediately fell in love with it and since then have been listening to Alessia’s music so much. Her other videos are great as well, but this one stuck out to be due to the involvement of the stories of random people who have external and internal pressure to look or be a certain way. It is a beautiful video and makes you want to go up to everyone you know and tell them that it’s okay and that they are beautiful.

2. Marianas Trench- Who Do You Love

My all time favourite band and one of my favourite songs, so there wasn’t much that it needed to make it one of my favourite  music videos of all time. And they did it beautifully. The video is basically them spending time with their loved ones and them donating the money they would usually use on a music video to good causes. It is beautiful and made me cry, ’cause it is just very touching. Also there is like loads of puppies in it and what else do you really need in a video. This video just makes you want to go out and do something good in the world and hug the people that you love (I start to recognise a theme…)Phit.

3. Ed Sheeran – Photograph

Photograph is a song that makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside. It is one of my favourite songs and I have previously said that I’d be more than okay with this being my wedding dance song, because it is just so beautiful. When the vide0 came out I remember vividly how I had goosebumps and I watched it about 5 times in a row and forced my mom to watch it with me (tbh I don’t think she minded it too much). But it is such a beautiful concept with the footage of Ed Sheeran as a child and I absolutely fell in love with the video!

4. All Time Low – Missing You

The idea of the band skyping fans and talking to them about their relationship to the band and what the community that comes along with being a fan of a band and how music can connect and can help you get through things is a very touching and amazing idea. I personally can relate to a lot of the things that the fans say in the video, for example meeting friends through bands and finding comfort in music when you are going through a tough time. Maybe that is one of the reasons why I love this video so much. I mean, again, this video is also in here because I love the song and the lyrics are well written and the song shares the important message that there is always someone around who cares no matter how bad you may feel. Plus it was filmed in London and I love London. 🙂

5. AS IT IS – Hey Rachel

 

The song itself is very emotional as lead singer Patty Walters wrote it as an apology to his sister who struggled with depression and anxiety. The video is beautifully capturing the emotions of the song and is doing it more than justice. To me that is amazing because when you have this beautiful, personal and emotional song, to achieve to create a music video that matches it, is not always something that is easy. Therefore, a huge well done to AS IT IS!

There you go. Enjoy! Don’t get too emotional.

Lots of love,

Katie

 

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Current favourite songs

I thought it would be time that I present you guys my current fav songs, again. Not sure if you guys are actually liking it but music is very important to me, so I enjoy writing these things. And especially with the latest event in Manchester I think that music is even more important than ever to remind us about how music can make us all stronger together and that we can all spread love!

 

Most girls – Hailee Steinfeld

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Okay, this song… Honestly, I freaking love this song. What I love about this song? Basically everything! I absolutely love the message behind this song. In case you haven’t heard this song or you haven’t listen to the lyrics yet, I can only advise you to do so. As the queen Hailee is, she basically describes that every single girl is a damn boss no matter of their physique and how they dress. Love the body positivity and the good message behind it that you can look at other girls and not tear them down, rather get inspired by them and try to be a strong, beautiful and fierce girl yourself!

 

I Have Questions & Crying In The Club – Camila Cabello

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I never was a Harmonizer, but always quite enjoyed their music. So when Camila left the group it didn’t really bother me at all, tbh. But listening to her first solo songs I can only say that I absolutely love these songs. Just to make clear, I don’t take any sides of Harmonizers or Camila fans and I don’t try to get involved in any drama that is going on there. I just can say that I absolutely love her songs. I really like the beat of both and I think especially with Crying In The Club it has a really recognizing sound and every time I hear it I just want to get up and dance. With I Have Questions I think that everybody who had to go through a breakup can incredibly good relate to the lyrics. I think that when you separate these are the questions you ask yourself. And again I just really like the beat and everything music-wise in this song as well.

 

Despacito & I’m The One – Justin Bieber

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If you know me then you’ll know that I was a very big Belieber when I was younger. Nowadays I enjoy some of his new songs but I’m not such a crazy fangirl anymore. But I have to say these two songs are just amazing. The first time I listened to Despacito I fell in love with this song. It truly is the perfect summer song and let’s be real Justin’s voice in it is just incredible and hearing him sing in Spanish let’s my little fangirl heart beat faster. Same with I’m The One, despite the Spanish part obviously. If you haven’t heard these two songs yet, all I can ask you is: Where the hell have you been? Go to Spotify, listen to these songs and tell me you didn’t want to instantly start dancing in your room or at least sit at the beach with a cocktail in your hand?!

 

Strip That Down – Liam Payne

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See, I’m a Directioner, in fact I even have been to two concerts of them before, so when I got the news about that they split up I can’t deny that my heart was a bit heart broken. But when I first heard This Town/Slow hands by Niall, then Harry’s new songs/ album and now Liam songs I can’t deny that I absolutely love every single one. Liam went down more the R&B root and I must say I really enjoy his new music. Obviously it’s quite different to what 1D used to release but nevertheless I love it. And as much as I would like them to join as a group again, I love their solo things as much as their music as a group.

 

Bad Liar – Selena Gomez

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Okay, is there actually one thing that this lovely lady can’t do? Once again she just released an absolute hit. I must say that it actually took me a bit time to loving this song but now I’m all about the vibe of the song. I have to say that it has a very specific sound, also with how she sings but I love this vibe, but I can imagine that it isn’t everybody’s cup of tea. This doesn’t mean though that I wouldn’t recommend you listening to the song, I definitely do recommend it. But I would say listen to it at least 2 – 3 times before you can decide for yourself if you like this song or not!

First Time – Kygo & Ellie Goulding

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This song is bloody everywhere and I have to admit I don’t mind that at all. As always Ellies vocals are killing it on this song and actually I would love to hear this song live, I bet with you she would perform it even better than on the track (if this is even possible). Once again it’s an amazing summer song and I can’t wait to lie in the sun with this song on, like is there any way to get in a better mood?

There’s Nothing Holding Me Back – Shawn Mendes

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I know, I know this song is out for quite a bit now, but this doesn’t change the fact that I absolutely bloody love this song. Okay, this also has to do with the fact that I recently saw Shawn live and I’m absolutely in love with his voice and his performance skills. But honestly, just listen to this song and tell me his vocals aren’t killing it?! This guy is so bloody talented that there was no way for me not to mention this song.

 

Lot’s of love,

Jenny xxx.

Traveling to Peru

In a couple of days I will be off to my next, let’s call it, adventure. I am off to Peru for the next two months. I will be working for/ interning at a small agency in Arequipa. Arequipa is in the South of Peru in the middle of the Andes. I have never been to South America so I am fairly intrigued to see what it is like! Yet I am already incredibly nervous about the journey because I am flying to a country that I have never been before and where I only speak very little of the main language. I am not entirely sure what to expect in my work place or the hostel, so there are a lot of open questions that won’t be able to be answered until I am actually there, but of course that doesn’t stop my brain from wondering and worrying. But I am also incredibly excited to go away again for a longer time (2 months) and to see something new and challenging, something that I have never done before! So I thought I would talk to you a little bit about what I am scared will go wrong and what I am hoping to get out of this experience. As the whole overthinking part is currently creeping in more and more I will start with that.

-The flight! Everything on the way there will go wrong, missing connection flights and everything else. My luggage will get lost. Something/ everything you could ever imagine basically. (I am a frequent flyer but still the worries are all there)

Border. Not being allowed in the country, doing the wrong thing or say the wrong thing. Again I know that this is irrational but still….

-Language. The language will be a challenge but I usually pick stuff like this up fairly easily plus they speak English in the agency. So I shouldn’t be worried but of course it is on my mind

-People! I mean I don’t know anyone there so I am worried that I will struggle with that. I mean usually I am alright at chatting to people but who knows.

-Experiencing the culture. I am a person that is easily adaptable and doesn’t really care too much if something is different to what I am used to. I mean I like to pick up qualities and things that you do differently, but somehow there is still the worry that I won’t fit in.

-Warnings! There are so many guidelines and warnings and everything that they start to worry me and make me think that I am forgetting everything… it is ridiculous. But oh well…

So what am I looking forward to, you ask? Funnily enough some actually match the categories of the overthinking which kind of shows you how silly all the worrying is, but then again I think it is fairly normal that you worry about these kind of things, but here are my hopes/ expectations:

-PEOPLE. I am excited to meet new people, to meet the people I will be working with, the kids I get to work with, the people that I may meet when I am travelling, the people that will be staying with me, people that I will randomly meet

-The Culture. Like I said I have never been to South America, so I am excited to experience the Peruvian culture, to eat the food, to hear their music, to see what it is like living there on a daily basis and to see how different and in what way it is different.

Traveling. I am excited to travel both simply to Peru and through Peru. I have been looking at some trips already such as Lake Titicaca and Macchu Pichu and I am generally just excited for the landscape and architecture because I absolutely love seeing and exploring new places.

-Seeing What I Am Capable Off. As you may be able to tell from all the worrying this trip is just outside my comfort zone so I am excited to push myself that little more and to see what I will be able to do.

Anyways, maybe some of you will be able to relate, maybe some of you think I am being silly, but this is what happens in my brain just before I go on a trip like this.
I am hoping that I will be able to keep you updated on my trip while I am away and maybe I even have some time to write some other things, who knows.

Love you lots, Katie

 

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Going to a concert alone

On march 3rd I went do a concert, alone. Scary right? I didn’t think either that that is even possible, let alone for me. But as it turned out it is possible, and as you all can see I’m still alive! So I wanted to share my experience with you. Let me begin from the very start.

It wasn’t really planned that I go alone. I saw on Snapchat that someone I know is going to a Shawn Mendes concert in Berlin, so I wrote her that I’m super jealous of her because I wanted to go so bad as well but I don’t know anybody who’s interested in his music as well. She instantly said that I just could see if I still get a ticket and could go there as well. Luckily I still got a ticket and actually a ticket at the block right next to the block my friend had her ticket.

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When it came to the planing part in how to get there I knew that I had to be all by myself, because she came from somewhere else and also could come there just before the concert started because she had school this day and the enxt day, so she had to drive back home right after the concert finished. So I booked my bus and a hotel room which was totally fine.

I arrived on the day, went to my hotel, got ready and went to the arena. I wrote my friend a message where she is but unfortunately her signal didn’t work and she couldn’t get my message. So I was all on my own. And let me tell you it was alright.

Of course it was a bit weird to not share my excitement with someone else before and between the supporting act and the main act and of course also after, but it definitely wasn’t the end of the world.

In fact it actually was very nice to be all by myself just enjoying the show. Don’t get my wrong all people I have been to concerts with were absolutely amazing and I couldn’t have wished for better accompanies but for this particular concert it was exactly what I needed.

When people find out that I enjoy Shawn Mendes music I’m always instantly labeled as a crazy 13 year old child. Which I’m defintely not as you all know. People don’t understand thaat despite the fanbase of the artist might be younger than me, you still can enjoy someones music. And thats what I so with Shawn Mendes music. I like how he writes his music and is super involved with all the processes of his songs. And I must say vocaly this show has definitely been the best show I’ve ever been to.

I just stood there enjoying his show and enjoyed how he got lost in the music and eventually I did as well. I sang along to his songs and just let the good energy in this big arena overwhelm me. For this concert and this moment in my life I wouldn’t have wated to talk to somebody or let me distract by anything. Sometimes you might think it’s shit that your friend bailed on you and doidn’t get your message so you’re all by yourself now and everything is shit, when in fact it was the best thing that could have happen to me for this evenning.

And hoenstly, I would do it all over again. If Shawn Mendes or any other artist is coming to Germaany again and I don’t know anybody who wouuld go there with me, I would go all by myself again! Because who cares?

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If you want to have a good time at a concert or show or wwhatever, who says you need someone with you? Honestly, I wouln’t have thought that I could do that by myself and enjoy being there, but hoenstly, I did. If you enjoy someones show or music has nothing to do with whom you be there. Of course you might want to share this experience with someone and you might have an awesome time with them, but as I just discovered it isn’t the end of the world if you don’t find someobdy. And even think about if you’re out with someobdy and they’re the worst accompany you could have wished for. For example just sit in their seat whilst you dance around beside them. Or you sing along from the top of your lungs and just sit there all in silent. Or if they just conpalint about how shit this is and if you can go home now. You defintitely wouldn’ have a good time then. So better go alone where you know ypu can be 100% yourself and enjoy yourself and the niht then havng someone with you whos dragging you down and makes you not having suhc a good time than you could have.

I’m definitely a persson who always needs the supoort form others and I’m a very insecure person myself but if I learnt one thing from this expereince than it is that you can have a fucking awesome time all by yourself and enjoy yourself. And yes, there might be people around you who comment on why you came alone and if you don’t have friends, but firstly they don’t know ypu, so they have no idea whats going on in your life and how many friends you have and secondly 8and most importantly) who gives a fuck about what strangerssay about sou anyways? Let them talk! You do you! They do them! Whatever!

So go to this fucking concert all by yourself! Or go to this party all by yourself! Or go where ever you want to all by yourself! And who knows, you might meet new people who you become friends with! 🙂

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Lots of love,

Jenny xxx.

 

Picture source – Jenny

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Marianas Trench Concert – Cologne

Hello everyone,

We (Jenny and Katie) went to see Marianas Trench on their Final Countdown Tour through Europe in Cologne yesterday. For Jenny, it was the second time seeing them live and, for Katie, it was the third time, however for both of us it was the first time we saw them in Germany.

So who is this band, you ask. Well, sit back, relax and enjoy.

Open Spotify/iTunes/YouTube or wherever else you listen to music and search for Marianas Trench ‘Who Do You Love’ and listen to this while you read this article.
Marianas Trench is a band of 4 guys from Vancouver Canada called Josh Ramsay, Mike Ayley, Matt Webb and Ian Cassleman. You may know some of Josh’s work as a song writer, though it is not even remotely similar to what they perform as a band. Their music genre kind of changes with every album as they all have varying themes, because they are all concept albums. However, in general it is pop rock/ pop punk. Although categorizing them in a music genre is, in our opinion, basically impossible since all of their albums, and even songs, are quite different and don’t really follow any music genre. But that is exactly what makes them them and makes them so great. The albums and every individual song are so well-rounded and well- written that every one of them is a masterpiece. For us, Ever After, is our favourite album ever, because it simply works so perfectly as album, as the songs are all connected musically and lyrically.

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Marianas Trench in Glasgow 2016

The venue was Gebäude 9, which was part of an old industrial estate turned concert venue, near the convention centre in Cologne. We got to sit in the yard of the venue and we wanted to give a big shout-out to the organisers who let everyone use the bathrooms whenever we wanted to during the wait. This was the first time ever for both of us where this was actually possible and it made the wait so much more enjoyable.
In the queue, we ended up chatting to other people about the band and everything else really. We met two girls who joined us for the rest of the concert and had little dance parties with us. We were amazed by how the band casually walked past a couple of times and everyone politely said ‘hi’ and no one went mental and everyone remained respectful towards the band. A big plus was that despite us not having VIP tickets we were able to hear the soundcheck, not only the VIP one but also the ‘proper’ one, through the open doors of the venue which got all of us really buzzing for the concert.
Inside the venue, we stood really close to the stage (always good for Jenny ‘cause she is small) and we got to take part in the sweat fest. While the venue had a great character it was absolutely boiling, however Josh’s makeup was on fleek throughout the ENTIRE gig.

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Josh Ramsay in Cologne 2017

As for the concert itself. We were speechless once again. This time it was the same setlist as when we saw them for the first time back in September in Glasgow (and the same one to the one in Edinburgh two weeks ago), but we honestly couldn’t have cared less about this fact because the amazing vocals, harmonies, songs, musical performance, and everything else were simply on point. Seriously, we have heard it before but still there were a lot of goosebumps and nearly crying and holding onto each other for emotional support.

They opened with the opening song of their latest album, Astoria (both song and album), which perfectly set the mood for the entire gig. As this song starts of slowly and then picks up it is the perfect opening song as it builds the crowd up slowly and by the end of it people are simply ready to enjoy the night and to be an amazing participating crowd.
Katie’s highlight of the concert is still the fifth song, ‘All To Myself’, because when we saw them for the first time they seemed so amazed that people knew this song and still they let the crowd sing the first verse by themselves and watch the crowd smiling seemingly overwhelmed by the crowd knowing it so well. It has always been one of my favourite songs.

Jenny’s highlight is always the song ‘Who Do You Love’, because of the incredible harmonies that make that song. The song has a beautiful vibe and message and you can feel that everyone in the crowd feels exactly the same way about it. It connects the crowd to the band and therefore creates a special moment.

Overall, throughout the entire concert the harmonies were absolutely killing all of us. That was the thing we always worried about before seeing them live for the first time that it would never be as incredible as it is on the albums. But every FUCKING time they destroy every single, tiny bit of doubt you could have for them ever, within the first song.
Josh’s vocal range throughout the night never seizes to amaze us as well.
We also loved that, as all of them are great singers, for the song ‘This Means War’, Mike and Matt got to sing lead vocals for the majority of the song.
As they started concert with the opening song of Astoria, they closed it with the final song of the album, ‘End of an Era’. ‘End of an Era’ has the opposite effect of ‘Astoria’, as it slows things down again while emotionally completely fucking you over one last time. Everyone around us was crying and the perfect combination of lyrics, music and harmonies. It is such a well-rounded song that afterwards you need a break to collect yourself, while it still leaves you wanting more for next time (AND THERE WILL 100% BE A NEXT TIME FOR US!!!!!)

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Josh Ramsay in Edinburgh 2017

In addition to the band, we would like to point out that their crew helped to make this show this great. They interacted with the band (yay to dancing and snapping along to the songs), messing about with the band, being on stage with the band for some songs and most importantly for whispering funny/ apparently dirty things into the earpieces of the other crew members and the band.

The perfect end to the night was that the band came out after the gig and chatted to people, took pictures and signed things. They were lovely towards the fans and actually took time chatting to them as well. They seemed to genuinely care about everyone which was nice to see.

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Our pictures with the band 🙂 

Overall it was an incredible night, we met lovely people and would 10000000000000% recommend the music of the band and seeing them live to everyone in this world!
We can vouch for their incredibleness and also for people who don’t know them as much, because the first time we went to see them, we went with a girl who had no idea who they were and even she had an amazing time!

We have one recommendation to Marianas Trench though: Please make a tour where you stay in every city for a night per album (currently 4) each and perform all songs consecutively. Alternatively, we would also accept just ever after in a concert hall with a full orchestra and choir. Thank you so much for taking this into consideration!

Lots of Love,

Jenny and Katie

Cover photo: Instagram @joshramsayofficial

 

 

The silent friend

In my friendship groups I’ve always been the weird and silent one, or the one who isn’t as comfortable as the rest. But lately I recognized this even more.

Don’t get me wrong I like my friends and I like to hang out with them, but sometimes to go out and meet them is very difficult for me. Let me explain why.

Since I was a little kid I was extremely shy and I absolutely hate to talk to strangers or people I barely know and sometimes even within my friendship group. Like for example yesterday I was out with some of my friends visiting a Street Food Festival. Sound awesome right? I mean what could you better do on a sunny Sunday than spent some time with your friends outside with awesome food?! And you’re right, there is barely anything that is better. Wouldn’t there be this weird feeling in my stomach and my head saying me how uncomfortable I am. We sat down on the grass, eating and talking, but for some reasons I can’t really join the conversations. I sit there and listen. I always do. Although a lot of times I would like to tell my little stories as well or say something. Instead I sit there and have this conversation in my head but never speak it out loud. I’m too afraid what they might say to it, or that it doesn’t fit the conversation or that people will make fun of what I’m saying. I’m too insecure about what people might say to what I said or react to it, that I stay silent instead.

A lot of times my friends even point that out. I remember one occasion extremely vividly. It was last year at a friends birthday party. He invited all from our friendship group around for just a chilled evening. We were about 12 or 14 people or so. When I arrived I made sure to sit right in the corner of the bed so I’m not in the spotlight or in the way. Everybody had a nice conversation about all kind of things. Once again I sat there, listening to what everyone was saying. When a friend of mine said: “All Jenny does is sit there in silent and doesn’t contribute anything. She only sometimes give a random fact and that’s it.” Knowing him, he did mean it with any bad intention but ever since it stuck with me. He is right. All I do is sit there say nothing the whole time because I’m too afraid to say anything or say anything wrong. But why? They’re my friends I should be comfortable joining the conversation, shouldn’t I? Even when someone asks me a question or says something to be/about me I immediately turn super red and just want it to stop and that people talk about something different.

I don’t know if this has to do with that I have a social anxiety or any other sort of mental illness/blockade, I only can say that recently I found it even harder than ever. And since my way of trying to solve a problem is to write about it, I thought it would be a good idea to write about it on here. Because ever since I met the other 3 girls I realized that I can be totally myself around them. They don’t judge me for anything I do, they only ever encouraged me in everything I do or want to do. So when we created this Blog I knew that this blog is my safe space. It’s a place where I can turn to when I don’t know where my head is any more and just write about it. There might be people out there who read this right now and realize ‘Hey I’m not the only one who feels like that’ or says ‘Hey there are other people out there who struggle with who they are and social interactions’. If there is even only one person out there who thinks like that I’m more than happy.

I think about topics like this it isn’t really spoken about and I’m really not okay with this. Growing up is a fucking hard thing and every single person struggles with all kind of different problems. Why can’t we talk about them and help each other grow?!

I really don’t know what I can do to be better in social interactions, all I know is even when I push myself to say something it doesn’t help. I still fell uncomfortable and shit in these situations and for some reasons I think that’s something that will never go away. I guess I have to learn just to live with it. Or maybe I don’t. If you know any tips please let me know in the comment section below or on our other social media:

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Anyway, I think I’m going to watch some Netflix now because that’s how I can just forget about stuff like this.

I hope you have/had a wonderful day!!!
Lot of love,

Jenny xxx.

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What Society Teaches Little Girls

I watched this video today and hearing Lilly’s self-perception broke my heart and yet I think it is just the perfect example as to what is wrong with our society and the values that are being portrayed on TV, in magazines, on social media and so forth.
Lilly is 10 years old and she is worried that she will not be pretty enough when she grows up for boys to like her, she even talks about how she cried because a girl in her school is so pretty and she believes she can never reach that level of pretty.
This is definitely not the first time I have ever heard this kind of stuff being said by a young girl and I mean I definitely have found myself worrying about these kind of things all throughout my childhood and teenage years, but it is still heart breaking to hear it.
I am now a third year university student, I have moved on from the world of school that seemed so important and essential when I was younger and I have to say these uni years are the ones where I have learned the most about self worth. I am not saying I am always happy with how I look or that I don’t wish to be thinner most days or smaller, so that I seem cute, or in general prettier, but at the same time I am gaining so much more confidence in other parts of my life that I care less and less about my appearance.
This kind of has to do that people start to react differently to achievements that have nothing to do with popularity or being pretty. People seem to value my other qualities and that is enormous confidence boost.
I get told that it is awesome that I can speak two languages on the level of a native, that I can speak French almost fluently and know the basics of Spanish, that I have the ambition to learn more languages. I mean how cool would it be to be able to speak all official languages of the UN?
People tell me that they value my guts for moving to Canada by myself when I was 16 for a year, for looking after a child for a year when I was 19, for moving to a different country for my university degree, for going to Peru for the summer to do an internship.
People have told me that they like that I am caring, that they know they can count on me, and I have to say this makes me proud because it is a quality I admire in other people.
I am starting to realise that there is so much more that people value about me than I would have ever thought, even if some of the things seem trivial to me, just because they are soooo normal to me.

But at the same time I am realising that some of my friends are still struggling a lot with these kind of issues.
A friend of mine lost a lot of weight over the summer and was dissatisfied with the reaction of others, that she did not suddenly get a boyfriend or that people didn’t really seem to care. But I have to say, I am proud of her for going through with it, but it does not change who she is to me. She is my friend and I value her for being a great listener and being great at giving advice, for being someone I can talk to when I am lost and knowing that she will be there for me. For being driven and wanting a career and doing everything she can to get there.

One of my friends says of herself that she is very opinionated and that she thinks that guys don’t find her attractive because of it and that’s why she acts so differently around guys. Which again, I very much do not agree with. Her wit and knowledge are some of the best attributes she has. She knows what she is talking about and she will be open-minded and is an amazing person to talk to when it comes to any kind of intellectual stuff. Plus she is funny and incredibly sarcastic and it is just beautiful.

There are so many examples of friends of mine who either worry about being too sporty, too girly, too thin, too fat, too quiet, too loud, too stupid, too smart, too boring, too something, to ever be liked by someone (guy/ girl/whatever really). There is seems to be so much pressure to be good enough for someone else when that shouldn’t matter as the most important thing should be, to be good enough for yourself, to be the best person you can be.

The reason that I am writing this as a response to the video is that we need to rethink the values we are teaching younger generations, because it starts at that age that we get our beauty ideals and ideas of what matters to us. As you can see from the examples from my life there are so many people that still struggle with the values they have been taught when they were children and, that keep getting reinforced by society, and we need to stop this as young as possible. A thought pattern that has been carved into our brains for 15 to 20 years is incredibly hard to break and that is why we need to make sure we raise young girls, and boys, to be their best selves and that their outer appearance is not the most important thing in the world, but that, as cliché as it sounds, it is on the inside that matters and what YOU choose to do with the abilities that you have! There is no point in hating on yourself because of standards within society, because conforming to the rules does not automatically mean you are having a great life, because we are all different and all these different qualities will help us be the best version of ourselves and help us to find our place in the world.

Soooooo much love,

Katie xxx

 

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