The one time I met an absolute twat

Imagine a nice evening with your friends, you haven’t seen them in over a year because you just came back from you’re year abroad, you don’t feel too good because the day before you just had your wisdom teeth taken out, but you definitely wanted to go. You have a lovely time so far chatting anyway about all sorts of things, and then it happens. The massive twat arrives. He’s a friend of your friend who’s party it is, first he doesn’t seem bad news and actually he’s not that bad looking either and at first quite friendly. But then all of your friends get more drunk, you obviously can’t drink because you’re on quite strong pain killers, although that’s the reason why it is actually quite entertaining for you, watching all your friends being very entertaining. But then everything’s changing. You all, some how, come to the topic of dating and stuff and out of the blue the twat says that he never would date you. You obviously want to know why, and so do your friends. Once you asked him why you kinda get a bad feeling and then it happens. He says “Well, firstly because you wear way too much make up and secondly you are not my type. You’re too fat.”

Everybody starts starring at him and you. You don’t know what to say because you’re that shocked, even though you’re definitely normally don’t have problems with sassy/witty comebacks. Soon you decide to go home because you really can’t stand to be in the same room as such a massive dick. Your friend, who’s party it is, tries to apologize for his friend but all of you know too well that the damage is done and he can’t take back his words.

Honestly this is a story I always try to block out, don’t try to think about, because let’s face it my self-confident was non-existent before and something like this really isn’t helping much then. But if anybody can learn from an experience like this then I want to share it with you guys. So let’s talk his comment through.

Firstly, ‘you wear way too much make-up’. Excuse you? What on earth gives you the right to judge anybody’s make-up? Everybody can wear as much or as little make-up as they want. You as a guy definitely have no right whatsoever to say to a girl she’s wearing too much make-up. I don’t know if it has occurred to you but girls aren’t wearing make-up for the sake of boys. I’m sorry to bring it to you but they don’t! Girls wear make-up because they want to and feel like wearing it. Do you really think we spent that much money, for a guy who can’t see the difference between ‘half-baked’ and ‘Charcoal Brown’ let alone knows the difference between Urban Decay and Mac. We definitely don’t! Yes, we may want to feel beautiful but we definitely don’t want to because of a guy. Okay, sometimes we do, but not if you don’t even know that a guy you don’t know is coming. And if we want to feel beautiful for a guy then he is a damn special guy to us and definitely not any old drunk guy we met for the first time.

Coming to the second part of his statement and the one that makes, I think, most more furious. ‘You are not my type. You’re too fat.’. Okay, steady on, have you really any idea what you just said? Let alone the idea what it could do the person you’re saying it to? If you don’t know it, the person you just said such a nasty comment to is a different person then you, so the person can look however the person wants to look like, also have as much weight on as she wants. Not everybody looks like Gigi Hadid, Taylor Swift or Kendall Jenner! And that’s good. If you want to date somebody like this then you should think about your standards because you’re certainly not Zayn Malik, Calvin Harris nor Tyga. Only guys like this would date someone who looks like them. Besides you don’t know what the story of the person is. It could be that the person you just said something like this to could have struggles with any form of any eating disorder currently or in the past or has a serious health problem. You never know. This does not only count for somebody who may weight a bit too much but also to somebody who might weight a bit too little. You just don’t say something like this to anybody. You just don’t. You never know the story of somebody by meeting them the first time, so saying something like this is just stupid, childish and let you look like an absolute, massive asshole.

Surely, I’m a bit biased because this story actually happened to me but I think most people would agree with me on this point. Talking about somebody’s weight is just nothing you do and the weight of anybody beside of yourself is non of your business. Especially if you say a comment like this which is basically fat-shaming. No matter what, no matter how much a person might weight, under no circumstances you should ever say anything about anybody’s weight.

I do have enough friends who actually suffer from any form of eating disorder or don’t see them in the right light. Meaning with that, that they don’t have a disorder but they still see themselves not like they actually look like. Like they always see themselves with too much weight on even though they have a lovely, toned body. And if they hear comments like this, do you really think it helps them? No! The people I know who have eating disorders, are mostly bought into this spiral because of comments from other people. Also if they already in this spiral and hear comments like ‘You’re too thin/skinny’ it doesn’t make them stop, it motivates them too continue.

We live in a society where we have a certain picture of a perfect toned, healthy body but the reality is that only a few percentage have body’s like this. Yes, sure I also would like to have the body of like Taylor Swift or Zoe Sugg but in reality I never will. Firstly because I’m nearly not as tall enough to have such kick as legs like Taylor Swift or such a good metabolism like Zoe Sugg but to be fair I also wouldn’t want to look like them. Surely looking as pretty as them would be a blessing but I’m a different person and I have a different body type, a different skeleton underneath my skin and also other genes.

People like the twat have to realize that saying things about anybody’s weight is just wrong and you never should do it. But sadly I really have no hope for him which makes me very sad that stupid and undereducated people like him still exist.

On a more positive note about the twat: He actually wrote an apology message to me the next morning but since he couldn’t even remember what he said, it looked like my friends apparently asked him if he’s totally insane for saying something like this, I haven’t really taken his apology too seriously.

If something like this ever happens to you, you is whoever is reading this right now, don’t just stay shut like I did! Take the moment were you’re shocked and then say something to this twat! I really wish I would have. I’m also not a violent person really, but at this very moment I really would have liked to punch him or at least throw a drink in his stupid face. So please do me favour, please throw the person who says something like this to you at least a drink in his stupid face. Women have to stay together right?! 😛 (P.S. Please don’t punch him though! Violence isn’t the solution plus you’re most likely to hurt yourself more than him.)

Lots of love,

Jenny xxx

 

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