Hi my lovely co-humans,
today I’m here with another book suggestion/review, whatever you wanna call it. Right at the beginning I want to warn you that some topics of this book are depression and suicide, so if you think this might trigger you in any way, please do not go on reading.
The book I want to write about is called “i was here“ and I love it because it’s an amazing story about friendship, struggles, loss, growing up and falling in love and it has this roadtrip vibe I really like.It was published in 2015 and the name of the amazing woman who wrote it is Gayle Forman. Her name might ring a bell if you have (like me) bawled your eyes while reading/watching “if I stay“. Yep she wrote that one as well and now she’s back to break our hearts again. Having said that I’m gonna tell you a bit about the plot. The protagonist is a girl named Cody, who lives with her mum who doesn’t really care a lot . She goes to college in the town where she grew up,even though she’d much rather gone to college in Seattle where her best friend Meg went. I say went because Meg doesn’t go there anymore. Meg commited suicide.
“Sometimes pain is tolerable until it’s touched”
The book starts with an e-mail from Meg to Cody in which she explains, that she’s sorry but she had to take her own life. Cody struggles to deal with it, because with Meg she didn’t just lose a friend, but a sister, the person she grew up with and at whose house she stayed more than at her own. The worst part seems to be that Cody didn’t known that Meg had any problems and she doesn’t see a reason why Meg has killed herself. So when Meg’s parents ask Cody to get their daughters stuff from her dorm room in Seattle, Cody hopes she can find out something about Meg’s reasons. In Seattle she meets Meg’s former room mates Harry, Alice and Richard and also Meg’s crush Ben ( who’s a super hot guy in a band, just like Adam from “if I stay“ , Gayle Forman and I seem to have the same taste). Ben seems to be a total douchebag at first, but as so often he’s not as douchy as he seems. With his help she finds out about an internet forum, Meg used to write about her plans to commit suicide on and where people encouraged her to do it. Convinced it’s one particular users fault Cody decides to find him and goes on a trip across the country. Meanwhile she finds out a lot about her friend, herself, finds new friends and finally starts to heal. That’s enough about the storyline I don’t want to spoil it for you, because you really should read it.
“Anything that kills hope is a sin”
I think it tells a lot about how friends, even best friends, can drift apart after school when you go to different cities and do different things with your life. That’s a normal thing and it happened to me with lots of my school friends I thought I’d always be close with. But the book also tells us that it doesn’t have to be that way. You should do your best and text them and call them and visit them and make an effort, if you think they’re worth it and you don’t want to lose them. And don’t be jealous because their life might seem better or more exciting, it’s never the way it seems. This book means a lot to me, because it basically deals with one of my worst fears: that one of my friends could be suffering and I don’t notice, just like Cody didn’t know what Meg was going through. It shows that it’s important to always be there for your friends even though you might be mad at them at the moment or jealous of them or whatever. A real friend is always there for their friends. Also the other way round : talking to friends makes a lot of stuff easier. You’re not bothering them, they love you and they want to know what you’re going through to be able to help you. Don’t think you have to deal with your problems on your own. An other aspect “i was here“ shows is, in my opinion, what a huge stigma mental illnesses still have. If Meg hadn’t been ashamed of her struggles and hadn’t felt like she should hide it she might have survived. But in our society most people don’t understand mental illnesses and call people crazy because of them, even though a huge percentage of people struggles with one in their lifetime. As I said it’s a really deep book with lots of meaning but it’s also a great easy read and it captivates you within the first pages. You won’t be able to put it away once you’ve started.
I hope your having a lovely day and your coffee tastes nice and your favourite series is on and that cute guy/girl texts you
love Alli xx